Bob Ouradnik's Biography

Robert Clifford Ouradnik
February 9, 1931 - October 8, 2011

[October 18, 2011 - Jody's note: This page is a "work in progress."  Heavens! ... it could become a whole book!  There is such a story to tell about my father.  What follows has been pulled from a variety of sources and I've tried to verify dates & information as best I could.  Don't hesitate to drop me a note, if you think something needs to be corrected.  My own comments about the events are in brackets and italics.  You can be notified of any updates or new postings by "following" the blog.]

Robert C. Ouradnik (Bob) was born on February 9, 1931 in Petersburg, North Dakota to Charles and Bertha Ouradnik, the eighth of nine children. His family was living on a farm about 11 miles south of Petersburg at the time. When Bob was 12, they moved to Larimore, ND, and he graduated from Larimore High School in 1948.  His mother, Bertha, had musical training and instilled an appreciation of music in all of her children.  At the slightest provocation, it was a common occurrence for family members to gather around the piano for a sing-along.  Bob developed a strong voice for choral and solo performance, and also played the saxophone and ukelele. His favorite instrument in later years was the Omnichord - a kind of electronic Autoharp.

Recent photo at Westside Church

In 1952, Bob received a BS in Engineering from North Dakota Agricultural College in Fargo, ND, but had developed a serious interest in the ministry, serving as a pastoral intern in some little churches while at NDAC. He married Nancy Ann Smith (Fargo, ND) on June 11, 1952 and two days later the couple drove to Paterson, NJ so that Bob could begin studying at Drew Theological Seminary. While in school, Bob was a minister at Westside Methodist Church in Paterson. He and Nancy had their first child - JoEllen (Jody) - in July 1954. Bob earned his Bachelor of Divinity from Drew Theological Seminary in 1956.

After graduation, the family moved back to Fargo, ND, and Bob was ordained at the Dakotas Methodist convocation in May. His first appointment was as an Associate Pastor - Minister to Youth at First Methodist Church in Fargo. In the early '60's, the campus ministry (Wesley Foundation) was separated out from the appointment at First Methodist and moved onto the NDSC campus. In order to maintain a full-time salary and keep his position as acting director of the Wesley Foundation, Bob took on a 3-point charge, with churches in Casseltown, Wheatland, and Absaraka, ND. The family's "home church" was a new congregation on Fargo's north side, Faith Methodist Church, where Nancy was organist and choir director. Three more children were born in Fargo: Steve (1956), Mike (1959), and Amy (1960).

In 1964, the family moved to Minneapolis, MN, where Bob took up an appointment as Youth Pastor at First Methodist Church near the University of Minnesota-Mpls and continued his involvement with campus ministry. During the summer of 1965, the family lived on the Ecumenical Institute (EI) campus in the heart of one of Chicago's inner-city neighborhoods, where Bob trained to become the director of EI work in Minneapolis, as an extension of his pastoral work. Some of EI-Mpls' urban projects included setting up communal housing that was patterned after the parent community in Chicago.

Castle Commune - Mpls, MN

The experiences with communal living in Chicago, and the EI work in Mpls, led to a 1970 interview and newspaper article in the Minneapolis Tribune by Robert T. Smith, a popular newspaper columnist.  The article described "middle age, middle class" communal living that was focused on something other than drugs and sex -- the stereotypic picture of a commune at the time. There was such an overwhelming response to the article that Bob and Nancy begin to hold gatherings to discuss alternatives to single family living. Interest continued to grow, so in 1971 Bob and Nancy formed New Communities, Inc. and chose to live communally themselves with five other families as The Castle Community in an old fraternity house near Dinkytown (Mpls). The Castle Commune gained some notoriety in 1973 when it purchased the house next door to the Governor's mansion on historic Summit Avenue in St Paul, MN.

Castle Commune - St Paul, MN

[Jody's note: The Castle Commune was even pointed out on the St Paul Bus Tour for awhile!]

Bob took a sabbatical from active ministry in 1973 for purposes of study and contemplation. This led to a desire to train as a bodywork practitioner at the Ida Rolf School of Rolfing in 1975, which in turn led to a second career as a "Rolfer."

[Jody's note: I believe that dad was the first Rolfer actually living and maintaining a practice in the Minneapolis-St Paul area, although there had been several others who stayed with us for brief periods of time and had Rolfing clients during their visits.]

The late 1960's and early 1970's were a tumultuous time:  The conflict in Vietnam.  The rise of the Women's Movement.  Racial tensions exploding throughout the U.S.  It was a time of personal upheaval as people began questioning the societal constructs that appeared to be holding individuals back from reaching their full potential.  It was a time of great creativity and experimentation that led to new ways of thinking ... new ways of being.

Bob was divorced from Nancy in 1976, marrying Cisela Wildes later that same year. Cisela had two children, Kenn and Stephanie Wildes, by an earlier marriage, who now became part of Bob's extended family. Bob and Cisela moved to a farmhouse near Prairie Farm, WI in 1980, although Bob continued to maintain his Rolfing practice in the Twin Cities for a few more years. Bob and Cisela also traveled extensively in Europe, even acting as house parents at a small hotel school in Switzerland for the 1981-82 school year. After returning to Wisconsin, Bob was appointed as minister at Grace UMC in Wheeler, WI in 1983. Cisela and Bob were divorced in 1986.

Another change of residence occurred in 1986 when Bob sold the farm in Wisconsin and moved to North Carolina. During a tour of the Egyptian pyramids, Bob had met Lynn Hill of Winston-Salem, NC. Bob and Lynn were married in 1987. Lynn had two children, Berry and Jamie Hill, by a previous marriage, so the extended family grew once more! Wellsprings, Lynn's home, became the focus of Bob's farming/nurturing instincts. He was continually working on paths around a small lake that was enclosed by the property, installing "meditation stops" along the pathways, with an American Indian sweat lodge, a Buddha, and other icons representing widely diverse spiritual/religious teachings. Bob and Lynn were divorced in 1997.

Bob & Lou

Bob had established a variety of connections in the Winston-Salem area and decided to continue living there. Through these connections he met Lou Culberson Iclef, the woman who would become his last wife, and they were married on June 11, 2000.

Lou had one child, John Iclef, by a previous marriage, and so the extended family grew yet again. Lou and Bob enjoyed sharing their hopes, dreams, and ideas with each other, which included plans to create a retreat center on Lou's property.

During the last eleven years, Bob has worked tirelessly to nurture the land around their home, which they called Sylvan Pathways, creating a beautiful space where people could gather for weddings, small group meetings, or personal retreat.  Bob also continued to provide pastoral services that were uniquely tailored to meet the needs of the individual's seeking his help.

Throughout his life, Bob had always been intensely curious about everything around him. He was passionately interested in finding connections between seemly disparate things. This was foundational to writing about his own spiritual journey, and his book, "Growing Spiritually Without Getting Bogged Down in Religion," was published in 2009 as the physical manifestation of his search to find commonalities between the religious and secular worlds. Even as the book was sent off to the printer, Bob was aware that his own understanding of transformative spiritual experiences was continually growing and changing. He began planning to revise the book, as well as create a blog that would continue the discussions begun in the book.

In February 2011, during a family gathering to celebrate his 80th birthday, Bob began sharing ideas with daughter, Jody, about creating a blog-space that would be an extension of his book.  It was his hope that he could share thoughts and writings that he had had since the book was published, and that the blog would also become an online space where others could comment and write about their own spiritual journeys.  The "Tell a New Story" Blog that you are now visiting was the seed that was beginning to grow out of these ideas.

Plans were cut short by a massive stroke on June 27, 2011, that immobilized the right side of Bob's body and left him unable to communicate through speech or writing, and also affected comprehension of the spoken or written word.  In the days, weeks, and then months following his stroke, two steps of progress forward was often followed by three or more steps backward ... A roller-coaster ride that finally ended quietly and peacefully on October 8th in a room filled with Bob's favorite music.

[Jody's note: Even after his stroke, dad had still retained a great sense of melody.  He couldn't sing the words to his favorite songs, but he could still carry the tune, spot on!]

Bob's warm and loving heart was open to accepting the beliefs and philosophies of diverse groups of people. Through his connections, travels, work, and play he gathered many into his immediate and extended family over the years.

Bob is survived by wife, Lou Culberson Iclef Ouradnik of Greensboro; sons, Steve (Carol) of San Marco, CA, and Mike (Lisa) of Boston, MA; daughters, Jody (Stu) and Amy (David) of Minneapolis, MN; grandchildren, Jeremy Anderson of Stamford, CT, and Madeline and Max Burton of Minneapolis, MN; stepson, John Iclef of Greensboro; brother, Henry Ouradnik of Larimore, ND; and sisters, Ethel Eastgate of Larimore, ND, Louise Johnson of Fargo, ND, and Betty Bischke of Billings, MT. Additionally, Bob is survived by many loving nephews and nieces, as well as previous wives and their children.

[Jody's note: I'm hoping that members of our very large and complicated family will forgive me if I don't list everybody's names!]

Memorial services were held on Saturday, October 15, 10:00 am, at First Friends Meeting, 2100 West Friendly Ave, Greensboro, NC, and in Larimore, ND.

[Jody's note: This blog only contains two posts that were actually written by my dad.  For the present, I intend to just let it live in cyberspace as is, but I would welcome any comments about how it might possibly be used to carry dad's memory forward into the great unknown.  Comments posted on the blog will be sent to my email address.]